Board Thread:Special Projects Division/@comment-25867149-20170323101408/@comment-25867149-20170326140534

Very well written Sodo and Jon! Just two things though, I think they both could do with some minor adjustments - I think Toast should seem a tiny bit more upset, if in a rather restrained fashion, about Ghost's disappearance in order to stay consistent with how Toast was shown around this time (he got rather upset when talking with Hoogan about it in the dream prison) so I think that a bit more emphasis on  the Swift Taylor incident and  Toast's emotional state following it (also how does Wolverton not know about this and why does Toast not talk about it with Leah?). The second is that the way the two scenes are written come across like he's offering Coast's position to Wolverton after fobbing off Leah, who is, despite not having done it for nearly a decade, the more experienced person for the job (not to mention they both worked together for three years, five if you include the two from the alternate timeline). So I think maybe it would be better if there's a bit talking about the fact that she doesn't want being related to either Ghost or Casket affect her getting the job and it being outside of Toast's influence on who gets Coast's job in order to not make it seem like the Rey/Leia hug in TFA.